God, how can I help?

I woke up this morning about 3am, thinking of my friend Shellie. Some background: Shellie and I went to high school together. She was a super-cool senior when I arrived at her school, I was a dorky freshman. We were in plays and volleyball together, and she was always very kind to me.

I reconnected with Shellie after high school when Ani was born, and what a delight it was. She's as beautiful as ever, and funny, and honest, and kind. It's a little unfair, really.  About three years ago, when Shellie and her husband Brad, and their three daughters embarked upon the journey of adoption, I was excited for them. I believe it was the great orator Jim Gaffigan who said, "Having four kids is like drowning, and then someone hands you a baby." As a person with four kids, I attest to the truth of this statement, but all joking aside, I was truly excited for Brad and Shellie and their girls, and so excited to see what God would do in and through them in this process.

I didn't anticipate that what Brad and Shellie would encounter was the longest, hardest adoption process I have ever witnessed. I didn't anticipate that three years later, it wouldn't be over. You can read about their journey in Shell's own words here, but let me summarize it for you briefly...after heartbreaking referrals which fell through, and changing adoption agencies after shady dealings, Brad and Shellie finally found the agency and the boy who would be their son. Jecoah is his name. He's the most beautiful boy. I won't post his picture here, but you can see him on Shellie's blog. After endless delays and disappointments and fund raising and fund raising, and fund raising some more, which humbled Shellie to her knees, they were finally, finally given the go-ahead to travel, to meet their son in the Congo, and to bring him home with them. Brad and Shellie left their precious daughters in the care of dear family, and flew to the Congo, claiming Jecoah from the orphanage. He is their legally adopted son. He is a Costain. All of that paperwork is complete. What could go wrong? They stayed with him in a "half way house" of sorts, just waiting for a signature on his exit paperwork so they could all go home, and start the business of being a family together.

Long, heartbreaking story short, the government would not let Brad and Shellie leave with their son. Their hearts were torn in two: they had three daughters in the States who had just spend Thanksgiving without their parents, and were about to spend Christmas without them, and they had a son, in the Congo, who had gotten to know and love Brad and Shellie as his mommy and daddy. Appeals were made to the proper authorities. We here in the States wrote letters and called everyone in the government we thought might plead their case and DO SOMETHING. We learned that Brad and Shellie were not the only family in this situation. Their residence there was full of families being held hostage by the Congolese government. After much prayer and seeking God's face, Brad and Shellie felt they needed to come home to their daughters, and it was decided that Shellie would return again after Christmas, this time for good, until the government would release Jecoah and she could bring him home.

I'm coming to my point here, soon, I promise.

I have been "in" with Shellie from the beginning. When this process first started and Shellie and Brad were trying to figure out how to pay for the astronomical expenses of adoption without going in to debt, the Lord spoke to me in the shower. "Tell Shellie to host a couponing class!" You see, at that time, Shellie was a master couponer. She could have been on that show "Extreme Couponers", which, incidentally, she will tell you, ruined couponing for the rest of us, but I digress. :-) As soon as I dried off, I got in touch with Shellie and told her what the Lord had said. So there were couponing classes. I made little donations here and there, as I could. I contributed knitted scarves to an online auction, raising a little more money, and praying, always praying, that God would stretch it, that he would make these little contributions into "enough".

Which brings us to me being awake this morning at 3am. "God, how can I help?" I said, over and over. At this point, Shellie's story is our story. All of us. I am not the only friend she has, indeed not even the closest! Shellie has the most amazing friends and family, who have rallied around her, and they have worked tirelessly, contributing much more than I have, to see this boy home to his forever family. But I am invested in this story. I am passionate about it. I can't stop thinking about it, I can't stop praying about it, until we can get this kid home, and Brad and Shellie can start happily drowning in their four kids.

It was as I asked God, "How can I help?" that I felt an idea laid upon my heart. It is going to sound self-serving, but please believe me when I say that it comes from the purest place possible.

I'll make it brief: I'm an independant distributor for Young Living essential oils. You can read about them at www.youngliving.com . I have never found a company I liked or believed in enough to sign up under, but this one defied my general "Not me, not ever" stance on direct marketing companies. I believe it's becoming increasingly important that we learn how to heal ourselves and treat our ailments with oils and other natural products, and I'm astonished to find that they work. I won't give you my full schpiel here, but get in touch if you'd like to hear it.

Anyway, here's the deal: When someone signs up as a distributor under me and buys the premium start-up kit (which, with tax and shipping is about $170.00. I'm not going to lie to you), I get a $25 bonus. In the month of February, I will donate my $25 bonus on every person that signs up to bringing Jecoah home. When this idea first came to me this morning, I frankly kinda told God "no". This sounds so self-serving, I thought "Lord, people are going to crucify me, they're going to think I'm using Brad and Shellie for my gain." But friends, please hear my heart. I would never. I don't want to think about the kind of punishment that is reserved for people who take advantage of situations like this for their own monetary gain, so please believe, the only reason I'd subject myself to such scrutiny is to help bring this boy home. And in truth, I cannot think of another way I can generate multiple $25 donations in a short period of time, so...finally, I said "Okay, Lord. Let's do it."

Details about what's in it for you with your sign-up:
The premium start up kit comes with a $75.00 essential oils diffuser, and 10 bottles of pure, pharmaceutical grade essential oils, including Lavender, Thieves, Joy, Purification, PanAway, Stress Away, Frankincense, Lemon, Peppermint, and Valor. It comes with tons of paperwork explaining the oils and how to use them. It comes with samples of several oils and their energy/weight loss drink. The kit itself is $150.00, and then with tax and shipping it's around $170.00. Yes, that's an insane amount of money (although it's $87 less than you'd spend if you bought it all separately), and I almost threw up when I paid it a few months ago. But I have to tell you, in all honesty, it's the best money I've ever spent. I am astonished at the difference the oils are making in my life. While I certainly would never tell anyone to forgo modern medicine and rely solely on the oils, I am seeing them cut short or cut off completely the life of colds and flu in our house, they are helping me with my hormone balances (bye bye, PMS), they are creating a warm and delightful aroma in my house through the diffuser...I can't say enough about the difference I am feeling in my life because of these oils. I believe they will do the same for anyone who wants to try them. And allow me to put your mind at ease: if you take advantage of this offer, buy the premium kit, and sign up as a distributor, nothing will ever be expected of you. Many, MANY people sign up as distributors for Young Living, and they only use their distributor status to get their oils at cost. I will not spam you, there are no meetings, I will not bother you about selling or getting new recruits, nothing of the sort. If you decide to go down that road, super, but nothing of the sort is expected of you, so feel free to just enjoy your oils and bless Brad and Shellie at the same time.

If you have ever wanted to learn more about essential oils, are interested in using them in your home, have interest in getting a nice start-up kit, and want to be able to order your own oils at a lower than retail cost, please get in touch with me via e-mail. Again, I will donate my $25 bonus for each person that signs up in February, directly to Brad and Shellie, and to bringing this sweet boy home. My e-mail is laurakwthompson@gmail.com.

If you are not interested in the oils but still want to help, please do! Please make a donation directly to Brad and Shellie's adoption fund. You can find the buttons to donate on her blog page, which, again, is here: www.costainpartyofsix.wordpress.com

It's an honor to be on the journey with Brad and Shellie and their kids. I love them so much. I pray that God makes short Shellie's second trip to the Congo...that the next blog she writes is about bringing Jecoah home.

Bear One Another's Burdens

"Bear one another's burdens, and thus fulfill the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2.  

That feels like a tall order. My own life is full of “burdens”...how can I be expected to take on someone else’s? I want to be helpful, but I don’t have a lot of spare cash, and I don’t have a lot of spare time. How in the world can I be expected to bear anyone else’s burden?

Let me tell you a story that my dear friend shared with me. She was in a store with her adorable 2 year old son. Normally this boy is happy and cheerful, but on this day, he was sad, and he was crying. Sometimes when these things happen, we can just scoop up our little ones and leave, but my friend did not have that option on that day. She needed to accomplish her task at hand. And so, she talked to and loved on her boy, she got what she needed as quickly as possible, and headed to the check out line. In front of her was a woman with two young boys. When it was the woman’s turn to check out, the woman asked the clerk behind the counter how his day was going. He said “It would be a lot better if people would get their screaming kids out of here.” And then the woman pointed at my friend and her son, and said “I know what you mean. I've been listening to that the whole time I've been here.” Let’s just all take a minute to grieve over this moment, can we? Was my friend having a super fun time with her crying boy in the store? Was she pinching him to make him cry to ruin everyone’s shopping experience because she enjoys that sort of thing? Of course not.  My friend was already carrying a burden. Her son was sad in public. If you have kids, you know...that’s a heavy load.  Instead of the clerk and the woman in line ignoring it for another 30 seconds,or God forbid, offering a kind word or a sympathetic glance, they chose to heap more burden upon my friend. They saw her heavy load, and they decided it wasn't heavy enough. They scrutinized. They judged. They criticized. They made her cry. And I don't mind telling you, it makes this God-fearing, worship-team-singing, cheesecake baking mom of four want to shake them silly.

Of course, it only takes a moment of feeling this way for me to realize that I have been the one heaping burden upon someone else more times than I want to admit. I have been critical of someone’s driving, their parenting, their cooking, their home decor, their fashion, their choice of theology. I have seen someone struggling and thought “They brought that on themselves. They are only getting what they deserve.” I have been less than gracious. I have been unmerciful. I have added to others’ burdens instead of easing them. God,forgive me.

Christians, we especially need to be in the business of easing people's burdens, and I believe we can do that in a way that costs us nothing. We can be kind. We can be gracious. We can let people in in traffic, even when they waited till the last minute to merge. We can be pleasant to the clerk who is new at her job and is taking forever to ring up our purchase. We can give an encouraging word or glance to a mom whose child is having a tough time in the store. Kindness costs us nothing, my friends, but it might be priceless to the person we give it to.

I have one more story to tell. This story shames me, but I tell it because it so perfectly illustrates my point. I was at a women’s retreat with the ladies of our church. I was sitting on the fireplace with my pastor’s wife, chatting, and my mom, across the way, was taking a picture of my pastor’s wife and I. It was taking my mom quite a while to take this picture...she was sitting there, with the phone held up, pointed at us, for quite a long time. Finally, my pastor’s wife said to me, “Is she taking a video of us, or just a picture?” And I said, slightly embarrassed, “Nooo, she’s taking a picture, but sometimes it takes her a little while to make it happen.” and my pastor’s wife said “You know, that happens to me all the time. My family always wants me to take the pictures because my phone takes such good ones, but it takes me forever to actually get the picture.” I saw, in that moment, a picture of grace. It was such a small thing, such a small story, but I saw that my pastor’s wife knows the meaning of being gracious, and extending it to everyone, regardless of the circumstance. She could have joined me in a good natured joshing of my mom and her technical prowess, but instead, she showed kindness, humility, and grace. She eased my mother’s burden.

My friends, I urge you to think about kindness. I am not talking about being a doormat. I am simply talking about choosing grace over annoyance, kindness over impatience, mercy over scorn. Let’s ease one another’s burdens in this way. It’s something we can all afford to do.